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  <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie</id>
  <title>Oh How Voracious...</title>
  <subtitle>we are</subtitle>
  <author>
    <name>Steam Octopus</name>
  </author>
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  <updated>2008-02-15T04:33:10Z</updated>
  <lj:journal userid="987947" username="jaggedpixie" type="personal"/>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:170009</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/170009.html"/>
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    <title>Dish Fight</title>
    <published>2008-02-15T04:33:10Z</published>
    <updated>2008-02-15T04:33:10Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;i&gt;You in your nothing&lt;br /&gt;Beats the fly&lt;br /&gt;So strange in your solitude&lt;br /&gt;Who rise by your last dignity&lt;br /&gt;To shit elsewhere&lt;br /&gt;Than your bed&lt;br /&gt;Though cigarette ash dusts&lt;br /&gt;Your pillow&lt;br /&gt;You await your doom&lt;br /&gt;He says in abject shame&lt;br /&gt;Warmed only by secret thoughts&lt;br /&gt;Whose fear prevent&lt;br /&gt;Their escape from your silenced tongue&lt;br /&gt;What misery&lt;br /&gt;Will break the day&lt;br /&gt;What pain will mire the brilliance of your soul&lt;br /&gt;What injustice obscures the life you are&lt;br /&gt;Hope chained beyond your grasp&lt;br /&gt;And mornings woke&lt;br /&gt;Only for death’s grim shadow&lt;br /&gt;Where has gone the joy of the child you were&lt;br /&gt;Back to what quiet pool &lt;br /&gt;Have those memories recessed &lt;br /&gt;Forgotten by the urgency of your end&lt;br /&gt;My pity for your beauty has eroded by your weakness and exposed disgust &lt;br /&gt;A loathing that will surely strike you down&lt;br /&gt;And condemn the miracle you refuse&lt;/i&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;...he wrote in a series of text messages to me</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:168024</id>
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    <title>coffin throat</title>
    <published>2006-10-28T10:10:49Z</published>
    <updated>2006-10-28T10:10:49Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Silence is death&lt;br /&gt;i hold my breath&lt;br /&gt;speaking has lost all meaning&lt;br /&gt;feelings spin-careening&lt;br /&gt;and i haunt myself&lt;br /&gt;with bleeding lungs wrapped in bandages&lt;br /&gt;and eyes pierced from inside&lt;br /&gt;my heart's in fetal position&lt;br /&gt;i sink into the burnt ashes &lt;br /&gt;of starved passion&lt;br /&gt;my sun eclipsed&lt;br /&gt;by the shade of the pervading moon--&lt;br /&gt;and i grieve.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The ghost of self-hate comes&lt;br /&gt;running through the abandooned door of my&lt;br /&gt;coffin throat&lt;br /&gt;just as love slips out the gaping &lt;br /&gt;gashes of my&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;hard to reach,&lt;br /&gt;apple-eager&lt;br /&gt;sweet-hungry&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;cloud-combusting&lt;br /&gt;where does the heart go&lt;br /&gt;solitary&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;soul.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;~~~~a poem I wrote a few weeks ago when i was very sad, very frustrated with myself, and quite utterly alone. i was helpless to speak, refusing inviting arms, and afraid of trusting. i had forgotten the love i had reclaimed for myself with the refusal to own my expressions creatively, spontaneously, and willfully without social constraints, and self-limiting inhibitions.  i had forgotten my right to speak, my worthiness of love, my thirst for water.  my mouth is the most underrated system in my body...</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:167595</id>
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    <title>Astro Profile</title>
    <published>2006-06-23T03:39:33Z</published>
    <updated>2006-06-23T03:44:46Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;a href="http://www.astro.com/cgi/atxgen.cgi?btyp=apx&amp;amp;&amp;amp;cid=adqfilexaOmbH-u1133163137&amp;amp;nhor=23"&gt;Most of this is right on...&lt;/a&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:166233</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/166233.html"/>
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    <title>too much</title>
    <published>2006-05-16T00:19:15Z</published>
    <updated>2006-05-16T00:19:15Z</updated>
    <content type="html">So hectic. Late Papers. Finals. Burgers at Julia's. Dog parks. Moon walks. FridgeHenge. Eeriness. High school prom. Changing beds. Picnic at the dog park. Swings and bird perches. Hot showers. Storage. Cigs. Lots of Julia and Will and Kate. Himalayan lunch. More packing and working...</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:165093</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/165093.html"/>
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    <title>Personality</title>
    <published>2006-05-09T02:28:10Z</published>
    <updated>2006-05-09T02:28:10Z</updated>
    <content type="html">What is it? What do &lt;i&gt;you&lt;/i&gt; think it is? I'm writing a paper, and I have been dwelling on this question for a while now. I've read and studied the ideas of Freud, Adler, Jung, Maslow, Carl Rogers, R.D. Laing, Skinner, Watson, Wilson, Eric Fromm, Victor Frankl. Not all actually have a theory of personality, some just have a philosophy on human nature or on therapy.  I have a humanistic, existential perspective on psychology and psychotherapy, while I am also drawn to Jung's idea of archetypes, individuation, and the adrogenous mind.  I also believe in certain ideas of Freud as far as the structure of personality (conscious, subconscious, unconscious), but his pessissism and deterministic perspective on the individual's ability to overcome himself and his social conditioning bother me.  I am in love with Victor Frankl, Fromm, Maslow, Carl Rogers, and Jung. These five, and also some Eastern influence, are the range of my beliefs on personality and human nature and therapy.  I'm sure I will find more as I continue my exploration of philosophy and psychology and political science...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I have questions for you if any of you would like to answer these:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1) How do you define personality? &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2) What do you think is a driving force in human nature? What do we strive for? &lt;br /&gt;[answers from other psychologists: Freud--the libido/Id (pleasure principle), Adler-- self-assertion and power (inferiority complex), social interest, conformity and belonging, Maslow and Rogers--self-actualization, Existentialism--meaning in a meaningless world, Eastern philosophy and Jung--centeredness and balance within all sides of ourselves]&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3) What are the characteristics of a "healthy" personality? &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;4) An "unhealthy" one?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;5) What metaphor would you use to describe your theory of personality?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This is one of the only papers I'm actually excited about writing.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:164654</id>
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    <title>Being</title>
    <published>2006-04-22T21:02:06Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-22T21:22:39Z</updated>
    <content type="html">The moon shines over a dark, dry, and rocky terrain--I see his distant silhouette.  He is standing over there, peering out atop the cliff.  I'm over here, sitting against a rock, fields of cold still air accompanying me in a plane of Earth and Space.  He doesn't know I'm here, and we are both paused  in thought, two separate dots with tons of lines between us.  We are planets in our individual orbits.  He gazes into the grand Nothing and the silence of Night holds us in the pods of our own Beings.  This is Being.  The miles of molecules between us glimmer for an instant and now I am standing next to him, gazing outwardly with him.  Our solid silhouettes are the only two upright Poles on the entire Plane of this thing called World.  It is vast, and endless.  Space is all-encompassing, and it defines us.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;We are aware of each other, but words are never spoken.  Time doesn't exist.  Standing here in our Selves, we are always one and two with the world, one and two with each other.  Without the Nothing, I would not be Something, and neither would he, so we are 1, 2, and 3 all at the same eternal time.  We are whole, we are separate, we are different, and yet the same.  We are together, but not.  This is Everything we know, and we are aware of it.  This is Being.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Still gazing into the Nothing, I move my hand from my side and hold it out to him.  A gleam of change takes hold in his eye, but I don't see it.  His hand reaches out towards mine, the ends of our fingers tingling with the slightest touch.  We are far enough away from each other that our arms form a straight line between us...Our fingers are charged with something made from the stars, and palms ache to catch one another. We both turn towards each other finally, resting all four palms horizontally, flipping mine above his, then his above mine, until palms fix to each other and slide upwards towards the sky.  Muscles massaging, our fingers grip, and we move closer to each other.  We are Together. It feels as if we are all One now...but are we? We are all parts and wholes at the same eternal time.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(to be finished)</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:164153</id>
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    <title>I think I can laugh about it now.</title>
    <published>2006-04-20T00:00:16Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-20T00:00:16Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Last night was without a doubt, THE most humiliating, mortifying experience of my life. Yes, &lt;i&gt;hum&lt;/i&gt;iliating, as in &lt;i&gt;humor&lt;/i&gt;, as in &lt;i&gt;human&lt;/i&gt; .&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And oh, a quote relayed from Chris:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise."  --Robert Fritz</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:163584</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/163584.html"/>
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    <title>Rumors</title>
    <published>2006-04-17T20:12:06Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-17T20:37:55Z</updated>
    <content type="html">You know, it's amazing... that rumor about me is STILL going on and people who I don't know apparently LOVE to talk about me and mention my name for their own entertainment. I think it's so funny that they're so insecure and bored with their lives that they have to bring me into it; I should be payed for every time they say my name... maybe I would be rich! Everytime I hear that some ugly girl is sitting in a room saying things about me, or some insecure guy who maybe wants to feel better about himself for not having me, I point and laugh hysterically on the inside at their ignorance. &lt;i&gt;&lt;b&gt;I thrive&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/i&gt; with this rumor... I love that people are too stupid to think about what they're saying, and &lt;i&gt;&lt;b&gt;too empty&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/i&gt; to have anything more fulfilling and positive to do. This rumor has proven to be the best filter I've ever had in my life for expelling all the random "anybodies" who just want to get in my pants, or the stupid people who want to have superficial relationships with me. Instead, by being true to myself and strong about who I am, I've managed to attract the kinds of people who are willing to have intimate relationships with me and overstep all of that bullshit talk. They see and love me for who I am. &lt;b&gt;&lt;i&gt;I could care less&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/b&gt; about the extra 100-something people who may want to know me otherwise; they're too busy talking about me to see what they're missing, and what the fuck do I need anybody who unwittingly wants to be an &lt;b&gt;&lt;i&gt;ignorant sheep&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/b&gt;? They don't even KNOW ME, much less try. I'm so glad I don't have to &lt;i&gt;waste my time&lt;/i&gt; with &lt;b&gt;&lt;i&gt;petty people&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/b&gt; caught in such a disgraceful web...they pity me and despise me for something that isn't true, but what I really see is that &lt;b&gt;&lt;i&gt;they pity and despise themselves&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/b&gt;--&lt;i&gt;otherwise I wouldn't be the scapegoat for their own insecurities&lt;/i&gt;.  Some might think that I'm cursed with this rumor, but I'm actually SO FUCKING BLESSED... I love it. Ha! &lt;b&gt;I pity you all.&lt;/b&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;To be honest, it has enriched my life twenty-fold by removing all the scum that would otherwise be attracted. I love to see the shit pouring out of your mouths. It makes me look better than you. And I can say nothing and just laugh, because none of you really knows the &lt;b&gt;TRUTH&lt;/b&gt;.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:163573</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/163573.html"/>
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    <title>Light Traps</title>
    <published>2006-04-06T23:39:06Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-07T00:32:57Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;center&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0941.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0966.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0989.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0999.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0993.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0533.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket" height="306" width="408"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/DSCN0542.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket" height="306" width="408"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Yes, my photography.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/center&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:163228</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/163228.html"/>
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    <title>When I was in Miami</title>
    <published>2006-04-06T08:41:15Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-06T23:55:00Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/f529e92d.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I cruised in Ari's passenger seat.  And now it's been empty for two weeks... :(&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I'm thinking of cutting my hair. And getting side-sweeping bangs. Not sure.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:161834</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/161834.html"/>
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    <title>Rides</title>
    <published>2006-04-03T10:20:44Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-03T10:39:11Z</updated>
    <content type="html">I saw a post in a community with a picture of a girl sitting on a car. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Underneath the picture of the car and the girl read:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"this is my car tink. she's a 64 falcon. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;that's not me. that's my other ride, katrina."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I couldn't help but laugh. Made me wish I could say the same...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://community.livejournal.com/birls/3783700.html"&gt;If you want to see it for yourself...&lt;/a&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:161426</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/161426.html"/>
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    <title>horribly sick</title>
    <published>2006-04-03T03:22:49Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-03T03:22:49Z</updated>
    <content type="html">On Friday, I woke up &lt;i&gt;extremely&lt;/i&gt; sick. My throat was killing me, I could barely talk, my body was exhausted, I could hardly move or walk, I had a tremendous fever, and I couldn't force myself awake until after 5pm. When I finally did wake up, my body was heated up, and for some reason my legs hurt. For the past few days, in fact, I've been entirely exhausted, unable to move, and hardly able to speak. Today I slept all day (until 6pm), and anytime I wanted to get water from the water fountain outside I'd have stop and sit for 5 to 10 minutes before standing up again. The smallest things, like putting on a sweater, further exhausted me. I don't know why I got sick, I'm sure it's because I gave blood the day before and it decreased my immunity system. Today I feel a little better; a friend of mine, Kate, slept over last night and took care of me (and I was BURNING UP), and today she helped me buy lots of soup, because the Cafe didn't have shit for a sick person with an aching throat... For some reason, EVERYONE could tell that I was horribly sick; maybe it was because my hair was disheveled (which is unusual for me), my face looked drained, and I was walking turtlishly slow wrapped in a blanket all day long (meaning meal times).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I think I'm getting a little better, but I miss my mom's Black Bean Vegetable Soup...sigh, it would make me feel ten times better at the moment.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:161249</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/161249.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=161249"/>
    <title>What Do You Believe?</title>
    <published>2006-03-30T20:59:43Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-30T21:28:40Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;center&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.infowars.com"&gt;http://www.infowars.com&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.infowars.com/alexjones.html"&gt;http://www.infowars.com/alexjones.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.infowars.com/pp_commentary.html"&gt;http://www.infowars.com/pp_commentary.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.prisonplanet.com/"&gt;http://www.prisonplanet.com/&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/center&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Uh-oh... if you go to the 3rd link called commentary, there are many links on this page that show up blank.[The Bush Crime Family: Three Generations of Treason; It is Unpatriotic to Condone the War in Iraq;  An American Counterfeit of the Rise and Fall of Nazi Germany; Proof of the Banking Conspiracy; Mass Media Mind Manipulation and the World of Illusion](!!!!)  Those were the only ones I could find missing...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I am suspicious of all media, ... if this isn't a webmaster's decision, do the people who control this site know those links (above) are missing?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.prisonplanet.com/analysis_lavello_050503_bombs.html"&gt;Bombs in the Building: World Trade Center 'Conspiracy Theory' is a Conspiracy Fact&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And what's up with this? &lt;a href="http://www.infowars.com/print/Secret_societies/in_your_face.htm"&gt;http://www.infowars.com/print/Secret_societies/in_your_face.htm&lt;/a&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:160514</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/160514.html"/>
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    <title>Re-energizing America; NRDC Report on Oil Dependency and Savings</title>
    <published>2006-03-29T09:38:27Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-29T09:41:54Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Just wanted to share a report from the National Resources Defense Council on how America's oil dependency undercuts our economic strength, threatens our national security, and how the NRDC plans to achieve national oil savings of 2.5 million barrels per day by 2015.  Look at the Table of Contents, especially at pg 19, 21, and 40.  The report talks about saving oil and energy through a combination of "greater efficiency and switching to domestic, biomass-derived fuels and materials." &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.nrdc.org/air/transportation/oilsecurity/plan.pdf"&gt;The National Resources Defense Council Report&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Thanks,&lt;br /&gt;Mari(bou)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And another site: &lt;a href="http://www.reenergizeamerica.org/"&gt;Reenergize America.org&lt;/a&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:160187</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/160187.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=160187"/>
    <title>This is How a Madman in Sheep Clothing Tried To Seduce Me.</title>
    <published>2006-03-27T21:31:02Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-27T22:13:07Z</updated>
    <content type="html">"Please, please, Maribou! I will be faithful to you, I promise! I swear, I am in love with you--please, please, I am serious. I will wait for you. Be the love of my life, I'll take you to India with me. I am so happy to see you, I took a cab all the way to see you tonight! Please, be my wife, I wanted to be yours the moment I saw you; no, it doesn't matter. I will wait! Maribou, let me kiss you, please. Please! Let me lick you. Maribou, Maribou, I am serious, I am serious, let me be yours, I promise I will take care of you, I won't hurt you, I love you!!!"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;br /&gt;These, the frantic promises of an unfortunately deprived soul.   &lt;br /&gt;These, the hysterical proclamations of a desperate 24-year-old boy looking for a wife. &lt;br /&gt;These, the absurd conclusions of a wild and passionate madman attempting to rip my clothes off and proclaiming his faith in Jesus Christ. &lt;br /&gt;These, the outrageously insistent pleas asserted by an emotionally impoverished foreign stranger.&lt;br /&gt;These, the sad reality of a fairytale dream.&lt;br /&gt;These, the psychotic results of a friendly interaction.&lt;br /&gt;These, the amusing avowals of a nice waiter I happened to give my number to--on the same night that I met him.&lt;br /&gt;Yes, these were his real words.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;center&gt;&lt;b&gt;Lesson Learned #1: Stick to Myspace!&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/center&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a name="cutid1"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Lesson Learned #2: Don't give your number to smiling, sweet waiters who bring you more bread and sauce and tell you you have beautiful hair.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Lesson Learned #3: Don't give in to persuading, interested people who have just interviewed you about everything from housing to religion to family to your laundry. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;center&gt;&lt;b&gt;Ari's response:&lt;/b&gt;&lt;i&gt; .................Run.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Or tell him you use to be a man.&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/center&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:158936</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/158936.html"/>
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    <title>This is amazing.</title>
    <published>2006-03-23T10:33:18Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-23T10:33:18Z</updated>
    <content type="html">You can be sure I will enroll for these classes soon or someday soon.&lt;br /&gt;I am so fucking excited to do it; this is what I've been looking for to expand my knowledge, mastery, and addiction to learning the digital arts, multimedia, graphic design, web design, and business marketing design.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.sessions.edu/programs/index.asp"&gt;I'm determined to do this somehow, someway. Soon.&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;In total glee.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:158038</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/158038.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=158038"/>
    <title>Not My Words</title>
    <published>2006-03-10T15:44:22Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-10T15:44:22Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Just now, as I sat down to this computer at the library, I found these words sitting on a word document, anonymously.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I like them:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"I assume what it means, I try to orchestrate encounters, yet I am constantly being told to just let it be. Non-effort, no struggle. This is what has been shown to me.  My heart and my desires are split.  Separate and complete. Even now, I am two-sided.  I am searching outside of myself when I know that it is inside where the happiness comes from . And I am happy. I am very happy. "</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:157821</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/157821.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=157821"/>
    <title>Deep Conversations</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T23:07:04Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-27T05:44:01Z</updated>
    <lj:music>Talia's BDAY mix to me (so beautiful)</lj:music>
    <content type="html">I had another favorite meal at India House today (yay for buffet hour!) with another favorite person: Kate.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;We had, of course, more amazing conversations about all kinds of topics: existentialism; self-actualization; humanism; The Art of Loving; authenticity; being held back by immature forms of love; selfishness vs. self-love;  the Ex; Identity and the choices we make to reinforce our own self-images; moving and starting a new life, a new home, new (consciously-made) friends and decisions through independent means (i.e. college); what it means to be a Neo-Dater; our amazing 30-minute kiss from a few weeks ago; the possibility of loving multiple people whole-heartedly; love through freedom vs. coersion or social conditioning, expectations, etc.; ...boundaries and respect for them; possessional love; experiential decision-making and identity-molding; the idiographic discovery and search for meaning; the idea of making new experiences just to reject certain things, pick them apart, think about them, re-evaluate ourselves, and adopt some notions or behaviors towards or against those experiences simply for ourselves; the basis of religion on fear and social coercion; spirituality; appreciation of life and being open to it; creating our own values, judgements, and meanings; alcohol and drugs (and other things) as conscious choices of self exploration and experimentation vs. uninventive fillers of boredom; the power of imagination and creativity; the loss of creativity in American culture and how it affects community; ideas for future families and creative planning of games, meditations, and ideas; what Quality Time really is; not emphasizing tv; allowing kids to make their own choices but presenting healthy, creative, productive, and empowering lifestyles by personal example; the power, self-respect, and fulfillment we attain by challenging ourselves in order to have higher self-esteem, regardless of the outcomes; the consequences of diverting challenge and fear which then breeds helplessness, low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, the feeling of victimization, and a passive attitude on life; how to turn outwardly-stimulated experiences into inwardly authentic experiences of will and decision (like dancing with no inhibitions, exploring sexuality without alcohol, being "free, open, and uninhibited" by self-motivation rather than by consumption-dependent means, etc.); theories of psychology and my love for it; theories of personality; why I want to learn  more about psychology; what it means to be an active agent of life where we as people construct our reality than let reality construct us as if we were passive receptacles of life.  Living deliberately.  The idea that we are what we are becoming, and that a healthy person constantly strives towards an ideal self.  Existential anxiety and omnipresent suffering.  The power of attitude and mind.  The idea that people can change and the possibility of change through conscious efforts gives us hope... because we aren't static states of being!  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;When we got back in the car, her Corgy dog was jumping wildly all over us and trying to devour my face.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Massage goodbye, strong hands, sweet appreciation.  One of the best companies I will ever enjoy.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;We should have a radio talk show one day.  It would draw incredible audiences...</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:157289</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/157289.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=157289"/>
    <title>Online Intro to Sociology Course, Free, Excellent!!!</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T11:09:47Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-09T11:33:16Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;marquee&gt;&lt;a href="http://cwabacon.pearsoned.com/bookbind/pubbooks/thompson/"&gt;http://cwabacon.pearsoned.com/bookbind/pubbooks/thompson/&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/marquee&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(Summer Reading?????)</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:157029</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/157029.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=157029"/>
    <title>Gemeinschaft vs. Gesselschaft</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T10:54:39Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-09T11:06:51Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;a name="cutid1"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;center&gt;Gemeinschaft and Gesellschaft&lt;/center&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Gemeinschaft and Gesellschaft are sociological categories introduced by the German sociologist Ferdinand Tönnies for two normal types of human association. (A normal type as coined by Tönnies is a purely conceptual tool to be built up logically, whereas an ideal type, as coined by Max Weber, is a concept formed by accentuating main elements of a historic/social change.) Tönnies' concepts of both Gemeinschaft and Gesellschaft, strictly separated from each other conceptually, are fully discussed in his work Gemeinschaft und Gesellschaft (1887), seven more German editions). Only the 2nd edition of 1912 turned out to be a success, and the juxtaposition of these two terms belonged to the general stock of concepts German pre-1933 intellectuals were quite familiar with and quite often misunderstood.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;center&gt;Gemeinschaft&lt;/center&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Gemeinschaft (often translated as community) is an association in which individuals are oriented to the large association as much if not more than to their own self interest. Furthermore, individuals in Gemeinschaft are regulated by common mores, or beliefs about the appropriate behaviour and responsibility of members of the association, to each other and to the association at large; associations marked by "unity of will" (Tönnies, 22). Tönnies saw the family as the most perfect expression of Gemeinschaft; however, he expected that Gemeinschaft could be based on shared place and shared belief as well as kinship, and he included globally dispersed religious communities as possible examples of Gemeinschaft.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Gemeinschafts are broadly characterized by a moderate division of labour, strong personal relationships, strong families, and relatively simple social institutions. In such societies there is seldom a need to enforce social control externally, due to a collective sense of loyalty individuals feel for society. Historically, Gemeinschaft societies were racially and ethnically homogeneous.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;center&gt;Gesellschaft&lt;/center&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Gesellschaft (often translated as society or civil society), in contrast, describes associations in which, for the individual, the larger association never takes on more importance than individual self interest, and lack the same level of shared mores. Gesellschaft is maintained through individuals acting in their own self interest. A modern business is a good example of Gesellschaft, the workers, managers, and owners may have very little in terms of shared orientations or beliefs, they may not care deeply for the product they are making, but it is in all their self interest to come to work to make money, and thus the business continues.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Unlike Gemeinschaften, Gesellschaften emphasize secondary relationships rather than familial or community ties, and there is generally less individual loyalty to society. Social cohesion in Gesellschafts typically derives from a more elaborate division of labor. Such societies are considered more susceptible to class conflict as well as racial and ethnic conflicts.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Since, for Tönnies, Gemeinschaft and Gesellschaft are normal types, he considered them a matter of Pure Sociology, whereas in Applied Sociology, on doing empirical research, he expected to find nothing else than a mix of them. Nevertheless, following Tönnies, without normal types one might not be able to analyze this mix.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;In business usage, Gesellschaft is the German term for "company", as in Aktiengesellschaft or Gesellschaft mit beschränkter Haftung (GmbH).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://cwabacon.pearsoned.com/bookbind/pubbooks/thompson/chapter19/custom2/deluxe-content.html"&gt;And a really good breakdown/outline of Population, Urbanization, and Ecology theories, terms, etc.&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"Malthusian Theory&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Malthus was the first to write about how population growth would outstrip a nation's food supply, leading to chaos. He argued that agriculture expands arithmetically while population grows geometrically, which eventually will overwhelm a country's ability to produce food. He argued for preventive checks on population such as chastity and delayed marriage, but felt positive checks such as war, plagues, and famine would balance population growth. Malthus's theory has not proven true because of migration, changes in cultural values, and changes in the economy."</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:156725</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/156725.html"/>
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    <title>I've Been Thinking...</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T08:58:36Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-09T08:59:00Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;center&gt;&lt;b&gt;I want to experience a sensory deprivation tank.&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/center&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I hear there's one in ABQ somewhere?</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:156624</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/156624.html"/>
    <link rel="self" type="text/xml" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/data/atom/?itemid=156624"/>
    <title>The Theories of Carl Rogers and his Humanistic Emphasis on Therapy</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T08:42:33Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-09T08:55:31Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;a href="http://pandc.ca/index.php?cat=carl_rogers&amp;amp;page=rogerian_theory"&gt;Self-Actualization, Authenticity, the Maladjusted Person, Socially Imposed Conditions of Worth, The Fully Functioning Person, The Ideal Self, Congruity vs. Incongruity, Humanism, Existentialism/ Experientialism&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Some quotes:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This ideal human condition is embodied in the "fully functioning person" who is open to experience, able to live existentially, is trusting in his/her own organism, expresses feelings freely, acts independently, is creative and lives a richer life; "the good life" (Rogers, 1961). It should be noted that; "The good life is a process not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination (Rogers, 1961, p.186)". For the vast majority of persons who do not have an optimal childhood there is hope for change and development toward psychological maturity via therapy, in which the aim is to dissolve the conditions of worth, achieve a self congruent with experience and restore the organismic valuing process.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;...The inherent potentialities of the actualizing tendency can suffer distorted expression when maladjustment occurs, resulting in behavior destructive to oneself and others. The actualization and self-actualization tendencies can be at cross purposes with each other &lt;b&gt;when alienation from the true self occurs&lt;/b&gt;, so there is organismic movement in one direction and conscious struggle in another. Rogers (1977) revised his previous thinking concerning this incongruence, stating that while he earlier saw the rift between self and experience as natural, while unfortunate, he now believes society, (particularly Western culture), culturally conditions, rewards and reinforces behaviors that are "perversions of the unitary actualizing tendency (p.248)." &lt;b&gt;We do not come into the world estranged from ourselves, socialization is behind this alienation&lt;/b&gt;. Rogers (1961) finds the human infant to actually be a model of congruence. He/she is seen as completely genuine and integrated, unified in experience, awareness and communication. Distorted perceptions from conditions of worth cause our departure from this integration. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;...While Rogers sees the common human condition as one of &lt;b&gt;incongruence between self and experience&lt;/b&gt;, this does not minimize his ultimate belief in the autonomy of human beings. Rogers (1977, p15) sees the &lt;b&gt;human being as: "capable of evaluating the outer and inner situation, understanding herself in its context, making constructive choices as to the next steps in life, and acting on those choices". This illustrates a belief in agency and free will.&lt;/b&gt; While humans behave rationally, Rogers (1961, p.195) maintains that: "The tragedy for most of us is that our defenses keep us from being aware of this rationality so that we are consciously moving in one direction, while organismically we are moving in another." Unlike Freud, Rogers did not see conflict as inevitable and humans as basically destructive. It is only when "man is less than fully man", not functioning freely, that he is to be feared (1961, p.105). The human capacity for awareness and the ability to symbolize gives us enormous power, but this awareness is a double-edged phenomenon : undistorted awareness can lead to full functioning and a rich life, while distortions in awareness lead to maladjustment and a multitude of destructive behaviors (Rogers, 1965). &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;...The "maladjusted person" is the polar opposite of the fully functioning individual (who was introduced early in this essay). The maladjusted individual is defensive, maintains rather than enhances his/her life, lives according to a preconceived plan, feels manipulated rather than free, and is common and conforming rather than creative (Maddi, 1996). The fully functioning person, in contrast, is completely defense-free, open to experience, creative and able to live "the good life".</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:156407</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/156407.html"/>
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    <title>Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs</title>
    <published>2006-03-09T08:35:59Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-09T12:20:26Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;b&gt;Self-actualization Need&lt;/b&gt; - "Even if all these needs are satisfied, we may still often (if not always) expect that a new discontent and restlessness will soon develop, unless the individual is doing what he or she, individually, is fitted for. Musicians must make music, artists must paint, poets must write if they are to be ultimately at peace with themselves. What humans can be, they must be. They must be true to their own nature. This need we may call self-actualization." &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The basic hierarchy is found here:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://pandc.ca/index.php?cat=abraham_maslow&amp;amp;page=needs_hierarchy"&gt;P, S, L, E, SA&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Just some good theories from my psych class that I've been meaning to put up for a few weeks... Some people may rearrange these needs in a different order as they see fit, but this is primarily the general model for what Maslow deemed the order which most people usually go for.  If one level isn't taken cared of first, it seems plausible that the others either can't happen or won't feel ultimately necessary at that moment.  However, everyone has their idea of what comes first, second, etc.  Some people would choose love over safety or stability, some people may choose self-actualization before love/belonging, some people may choose, during times of war, other things first.  But I leave you this information for your own awakening or consideration.  It's always good to open your mind to new bubbles of thought or revisit what you thought was already set in your mind.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;According to Maslow, psychologically "healthy" people show:&lt;br /&gt;1. An objective perception of reality&lt;br /&gt;2. Acceptance of their own natures&lt;br /&gt;3. A commitment and dedication to some type of work &lt;br /&gt;4. Naturalness, simplicity in behavior, and spontaneity&lt;br /&gt;5. Independence; a need for autonomy and privacy&lt;br /&gt;6. Intense mystical/peak experiences&lt;br /&gt;7. Empathy with, and affection for, all humanity--including strong social interests&lt;br /&gt;8. Resistance to conformity&lt;br /&gt;9. Democratic characteristics&lt;br /&gt;10. Keenness to be creative</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:155707</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/155707.html"/>
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    <title>Some New Digital Pieces</title>
    <published>2006-03-06T19:35:05Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-07T01:57:15Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/biggirllittleworldflat.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a name="cutid1"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/flutteraframe.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/sliverkiss2flat.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/facescape.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/nurtured2flat.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;       &lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/jumpskylesscontrast.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b93/kaleidoscopik/78e6261a.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And I have many more variations of the same ones...</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:jaggedpixie:155531</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://jaggedpixie.livejournal.com/155531.html"/>
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    <title>Chinese Proverbs</title>
    <published>2006-03-03T20:18:32Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-03T20:18:32Z</updated>
    <content type="html">*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who run in front of car get tired. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*&lt;br /&gt;Man who run behind car get exhausted. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man with one chopstick go hungry. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who eat many prunes get good run for money. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in &lt;br /&gt;cat house. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who fight with wife all day get no peace at night. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who drive like hell, bound to get there. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who stand on toilet is high on pot. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Man who fart in church sit in own pew. &lt;br /&gt;*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* &lt;br /&gt;Crowded elevator smell different to midget.</content>
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